Nearing the End

Since I last wrote, I have left New York. It was difficult to leave and I was not ready. However, I want to catch up since my last entry!

Our last ministry site was in Brooklyn and it was called Power Up Fellowship and Faith (Puff ministries). It is in Brownsville, which is considered one of the most dangerous parts of Brooklyn—this was proved further when on one of our days the Bishop took us to the police precinct for that area. It was eye-opening to hear the stats for the violent crimes in that area. At first, it was a little scary to know the reality, but then I reminded myself that I had not once felt unsafe in that area. The Bishop had always made me feel safe with my team and as well, I knew that God had plans for us there. Usually, the Bishop from this ministry works with gangs to defuse violence. At the time we were working with the ministry we were focusing on other things. During the time we were at Power Up, our team helped clean up the church, pull weeds, pick up trash, play with the Bishop’s grandchildren, and set up a table filled with donations for community members to come by and take. A couple of my team members went to stores nearby to ask for donations and one store gave some items to put on the tables. The Bishop had such a joy about serving in that area and before we left he asked us what we learned and how we thought they could better serve the community. I thought it was very humble of him to do such and I appreciated that he would ask us. The Bishop and his wife, the Pastor were two very wonderful people to work with and I enjoyed serving their ministry. In August, they will be having a health and education fair so please pray that they are equipped with the resources to best serve the community.

During the week of our last ministry site we had our usual meetings—Monday nights for the whole track, Tuesday night we had dinner at one of the staff’s apartments and discussed compassion, and Wednesday was a free night. On the night of Thursday the 15th we had a progressive dinner. There are a few staff people that live on a certain part of the city and so our whole track split into three (“Action group” which is like a bible study group) and took turns going to different staff apartments. After going to three different apartments and discussing staff life in the city- the whole track reconvened in a community center for dessert and track debrief. Debrief was a time for our track director to encourage us to continue to grow in what we learned on project and in our faith in Christ. It gave all the participants time to share stories from experiences throughout project. I was really empowered by the stories that the people on my track shared because they not only shared what had happened to them, but were also very honest and glorified God through their speaking. The night was a little bittersweet because it was one of our last nights together as a complete track.

On Friday, a few of the girls and I went to China Town to pick up souvenirs for people. We had to be fast about it because we had to meet the rest of the track back at our residence at 1. We were having one last (complete) track time because our director and some other staff were leaving for home on Sunday. I enjoyed exploring China Town with the girls. Our track went to Governor’s Island which we had to take a ferry to (I think it was pretty hot that day). The plan was to either ride bikes around the island (“free Fridays”) or to just walk around. Most of our track explored on foot, however a couple staff families rode a family bike/cart. There were a bunch of beautiful buildings and just open space there (no one resides on Governor’s Island). A group of us just walked around…I eventually got a chicken pita (that eventually squirted on me!) and then icecream. We stopped at a playground and swung. Time went really quickly and we went back to meet one another as a whole track. We took time to pray as teams and as a track before taking the ferry back to Manhattan. We thanked God for experiences and the work he had done in us and through us. It was prayed that He would continue those things. We had to say goodbye to some staff and the realization that project would be ending soon set in.

After returning from Governor’s Island a group of us got ready to go the Art Installation that the Art track had been preparing for all summer. It was ah-mazing. I’m already such an art lover, but it was even greater to see artists who wanted to incorporate their faith with their art. There were seven pieces: some were installations, some were photos, one was a performance, and another was a short film. It was all introspective and included themes. It gave me a lot to think about and to appreciate as well. Afterwards the group of us that went to the installation went to dinner in Chelsea. We went to this restaurant called RUB (Righteous Urban Barbeque) where we got a meat plate and some sides. The six of us ate most of it (it was delicious!) and then saved the rest to give away. Once finishing dinner we split in half and I and two other women walked around Chelsea. First, we stopped in a random dollar store and then we ended up at Hudson River Park. It was beautiful at night. We explored further and then went back home. Before we went back, we had a chance to pray for a homeless man and give him our leftovers. He had some difficulties with his wife and it was our prayer that he would turn to something other than alcohol to relieve his pain. It was a full and memorable last Friday.

Simulation and Forward

Well—part two of simulation information is here. Our track was informed we would have to go out into Manhattan (we were in Queens at that moment) to do a scavenger hunt in groups. There were three people in our group. As a part of the scavenger hunt we had to do things like collect 20 cans or bottles, ask a stranger for 25 cents, find something useful in a dumpster, find something to eat, ask where to find various emergency assistance helps, talk to an elderly person, and more. I have to be honest, at first I was annoyed and frustrated that we had to do this. Unlike other ministry teams, ours had been sheltered from being seen by much of the public except when we were waiting outside the warehouse. It was selfish, but I didn’t want to be seen by a bunch a people and I didn’t want to talk to them or make that effort. I felt uncomfortable in the clothes I had worn for two days, that I had slept in, worked in, sweated in, and had gotten dirt in. At some point during the process, God changed my heart. I was blessed to have a team member step up and talk to people because I seemed to inhibit myself from reaching out for help. I could easily see how it could quickly become frustrating for homeless people to ask for help. People ignore the homeless, respond negatively (by speech or looks), and do not often have the information needed—this is what my team experienced anyway. At the end of the scavenger hunt, we were to meet the staff at a subway stop near our residence and I thought, “That would just be mean to tease us like that if we weren’t done”. Our group ended up having a long conversation with a woman who had been homeless. She informed us of the difficulty she has had getting a job, keeping clothes (they frequently got stolen), among other issues. She really had a lot to tell us, it was important to listen, but then we were late meeting the others. Whoops.

It ended! We returned to our resident Thursday night. Although it was only two days, God used it to impart a lot of wisdom and insight:
- Desperation and sadness can come on quickly when in dire situations.
- I have to depend on God for strength—hunger, tiredness, and weakness—I cannot overcome on my own.
- I didn’t care enough about those in poverty before even though I thought I did.
- My life is rich with blessings which I can offer to others.
- People are meant to interact with one another—what happens when an individual is frequently ignored? Would they go crazy or what?
- I should consider how I can better minister to people’s needs with what I have.
- I had it better than people in real poverty do and yet, it was hard. How difficult it must be to experience daily struggle to survive within an indefinite time period.
- Do NOT discount people based on appearance or their standing in life. It is not that simple to understand someone. Stop, listen, and love.

Those are just snippets of what I have learned and been reminded of by the simulation. The day after, Friday we were encouraged to sleep in and ponder over the experience because we were going to discuss it that night. We arrived at our debrief location where we were videotaped and our whole group discussed poverty. Afterwards, our staff sweetly served us dinner (Italian food!) and we had dessert afterwards. Following that our track voted to watch “Remember the Titans” (I voted for “Up”) and enjoyed each other’s company. We cleaned up the space and a small group of us went to Times Square for a little bit.

Saturday and Sunday I did some random things: went to a coffee shop (which I saw a bride and groom at…unique!), stopped at a ministry event, went out to eat, went shopping, saw the Brooklyn Bridge (and walked across), had ice cream (twice!), and my favorite: attended Brooklyn Tabernacle! It is a church that has a huge choir. It’s more than that though…the passion for God is grand and their desire to listen to the Holy Spirit is great! During the service we prayed for some Christians in Pakistan because in their area requests to kill Christians had been made. It was difficult to hear, but also revealed reality of how good I have it to feel safe most of the time.

On Monday (yesterday), we started our fourth and final ministry site! Sad, just sad because I feel I can do more here. I feel it shouldn’t be over soon—I’m not ready. Please pray our teams continue to work hard, stay focused on being here, and that we share God’s love!

Feeling It

So, on the Fourth I did see fireworks, from a rooftop near the river. FUN! I’m glad I did, otherwise it wouldn’t have felt like the Fourth. About half of my track was at this apartment building because a friend had invited us over. We ate beef hotdogs, kettle chips, and chocolate chip cookies on the roof and Catch Phrase followed. After the fireworks show ended, we waited a while to leave because there were SO many people leaving Hudson River Park after having watched fireworks. The next day we started our next ministry site.

My team’s ministry site this week was at Here’s Life Inner City. This is the Inner City ministry of Campus Crusade for Christ. Here’s Life comes alongside already existing ministries and equips them with tools and resources. The first day at the ministry site (Monday) we were preparing dinner bags. Monday night our whole project (less than 200) did a homeless outreach in Manhattan. To prepare for that our team and thank goodness another team (11 people total) prepared the dinner bags for that night. 500 pb and js. 180 handwritten cards. 250 sacked meals. One God who loves grandly. Without having the other team with ours I know we would have not completed the task, so I am thankful they ended up being with us. That night we set out in different teams to distribute meals and love the homeless.

I went with a couple people near 55th and Lex. Throughout the couple or so hours we were there, we spoke with a couple men and offered them food. One desired so much to speak with someone that we barely got words in to respond and he didn’t respond to us asking questions. Another man conversed with us and had a lot of wisdom to offer. Two very different men, but both needing attention and love from people. Don’t ignore the homeless, they are people and they are not who you think they are. We made sure to give out the rest of the food we had on us before stopping at a store to get a little snack. That night we made rootbeer floats at a friend’s place and considered the experience we had had.

The next day it was back to the ministry site, we worked in the Warehouse and in the office, moving and organizing many various things. It was hot sometimes and hard work. We all kept going though and helped how we could. Tuesday night we had our action group time, which is essentially bible study. We continued to discuss God’s love for those in poverty. Additionally, how God desires and expects people to have compassion on one another:

“If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” Philippians 2:1-4

At the end of the meeting, our leaders said some suspicious things and everyone begin to question what was going to happen next. They said we would have a meeting the next morning at 6 a.m. on the roof of the building. All the people on my track begin discussing what could possibly be the reason and some begin to get nervous and anxious. There were rumors which I tried to disregard until I knew the truth. The next morning I got up at 5:30 a.m. to get ready for the day because I didn’t know what was coming. Once I got to the meeting, we were given a sheet of instructions and told to get three things from our room in fifteen minutes—we were starting a poverty simulation. I went upstairs chose my three items: pillow, mouthwash, and a bag in addition to our allowed items: bible, journal, pen, metrocard, and a water bottle. When we returned to meet our staff they took our keys and our cell phones (we could change our voicemails) and told us we were not residents of our building until further notice. We were given fake $20 and told we had some decisions to make. Here’s some of our choices: $6/meal, $4/shower, $2 to sleep on a warehouse floor, $1/transportation (per bus or subway ride), $3 for our clothes, $9 to sleep on carpet and so on. As can be seen from some simple math---there was no way we could afford everything not even all three meals and that was the point. That first day we had to travel to our site by subway so that was $1 (although some teams had $4 in expense!), I bought one meal-dinner, and I also decided I would sleep on the floor. I gave $1 to someone and saved the rest. We were kicked out at 7 a.m and we had to be at our ministry site at 9:30…so needless to say we had quite a bit of time to sit around. So, our track sat outside of the building till it was time to leave because we didn’t have money and we had no place to go.

Our team got tired of waiting outside of our residence so we decided to head to our ministry site early. It was our third day at the site and we waited outside for a while before the director of the ministry kindly let us in the building. He knew what we were experiencing and going to experience so he had compassion on us during the simulation. Our team worked the warehouse that day, through the heat and the humidity while lifting, pushing boxes and objects. It was not long until we became tired. The morning time went fast and it was time to have lunch. However, I had not bought a lunch! I was expecting to go without; I had not had breakfast. Remember the homeless outreach I mentioned before? Well, there were some leftover supplies, so the director with compassion and without prompting bought our team a loaf of bread and I had lunch! Oh the thankfulness. I would have continued to work on an empty stomach otherwise. After finishing our afternoon slot of organizing the warehouse, we were kicked out of the ministry site at 4. We had to be back at 5 to check in and then wait until 6 to go in. The good part was our whole track got to spend quality time together that way! Even though we were hot, tired, hungry, and resting on the public sidewalk…some were even sleeping. As we were brought into a room for dinner, there were three distinct areas set up: a big bowl of rice krispies with cups on the floor, spaghetti, meatballs, Snapple’s, cheesecake and then another area with sandwiches and chips. People randomly chose cards and I received a card entitled “low income”.

The staff explained to us that these different meals symbolized the inequality of food distribution around the world—not because of a lack of food, but a lack of sharing. I was blessed that earlier that day the director for my site had supplied lunch otherwise that day I would have only had a Styrofoam cup full of rice krispies. Totally a God thing that I didn’t have to be as hungry. After dinner I was really tired from the lack of sleep and work so while my track was socializing, I was relaxing/going in and out of sleep. Around 9, the staff told us the lights would be going out in five minutes and so everyone scrambled to get ready. The staff had removed a clock and any other source of time that we had available to us. If people had left their things in the room, staff would steal it (to recognize that items get stolen at homeless shelters). So, someone lost their pillow and another had their shoes taken. We all slept on the floor and while we were trying to sleep staff would come in and ring bells, set off sounds, and turn on the lights. (At least because of the heat we got to sleep in the office otherwise we would have slept on the warehouse floor). I feel blessed because I am a deep sleeper and once I was further in sleep those things while they woke me up, did not wake me up completely. Unfortunately for my project friends some of their sleep was completely disrupted (the noise making simulated feelings of discomfort and noise that exists in shelters). Everyone either had their stuff near them or underneath them for fear of having it stolen; I put my knapsack on backwards so that it would not get taken.

At 4:30 A.M. staff came in and told us—you have an hour left to sleep. They awoke us an hour later and stated we had five minutes to get our things from the room and fifteen to get ready. They then distributed the money and food for the day after we had finished getting ready; we were forced out by 6 a.m. (Oh, I also lost $10 that day…good thing I had saved some from yesterday). Our team had over three hours before we needed to be to our ministry site! We hung outside, resting on park benches and sidewalks; we frequently fell asleep. By 9 in the morning we were let into our site—ready for another hard day of work in the warehouse. Actually, under normal circumstances it probably would have been fine, but our team was tired and hungry so it was difficult to function. We were moving many heavy objects as well as organizing items. However, the director was gracious and allowed us a long lunch and to finish early to rest. What if this had been real life though? We would have had to work our full shifts—relying on God to make it through more than we had. Like the previous night, we had to wait around for two hours to get back into the building.

I had not paid for dinner that night so I had to wait around a little longer. The director of our ministry site was speaking to our group that night, but everyone seemed distracted and had a lack of interest. After hearing more about why some staff had decided to work in the inner city we were told we were going to do the “Homeless Survival Hunt”.

I will explain this experience and more on the simulation in the next entry (from Thursday night and on)! Please continue to pray for us: for passion for those we are serving, for energy, to keep focused on our reasons for being here-not home, and for us to share the love of Christ.

Another Unusual Fourth

I can say for certain there has only been a handful of times that I have not been able to follow tradition for the 4th of July. This is one of those years and this happened three years ago when I was in New York for the summer. It is a little disappointing to not be able to follow tradition; going back to the area my father grew up and spend time with my parents and my best friend’s family. However, there is a reassurance in being away as well. I know I am supposed to be here and today has not been bad, just different. This morning we went to church then I ate lunch with my group and discussed the speaker I mentioned before, Sy Rogers. Since returning from lunch in Central Park, I have been relaxing in room until I leave for the next adventure. Getting some rest in before this next week of serving is good too. I am hopeful that I WILL see fireworks tonight. My sweet best friend has been sending me text messages today as they do our usual 4th activities so that I can enjoy it vicariously.

As said before, I plan on discussing some things that I heard and learned from Sy Rogers (I believe you can learn more about him on syrogers.com). But, before I forget, I want to mention some sincere and beautiful moments we had with the children this week. Although children can be disobedient they have redeeming times (just like us adults, imagine that!) One of the boys who fought and ran a lot also braided my hair on Wednesday. At one moment, I had three children braiding my hair and soon after that two other girls on my team were having their hair braided as well. It was nice to see the children delight in some simple things like playing “Miss Mary Mack” (you know the patty cake rhyme? “Miss Mary Mack Mack Mack, All dressed in black black black…”). Also, they were very excited about going to the park the last day we were with them.

Now back to Sy. Just a forewarning, some of the topics I discuss may be sensitive or controversial in some arenas, but I want to be free to share them for the sake of honesty and genuineness. I have nowhere near the space to reiterate Sy’s story nor in the best way, so if you are curious about his life story I will direct you to the website in the previous paragraph. He is a very capturing man with quite a story. He spoke to us for almost ten hours this week (in split segments). Here are some quotes and thoughts on what he said:
- He often mentioned that everyone is sinful. People are quick to rank their self above others when it comes to behavior. However, no matter an individual’s behavior, if they are not reconciled to God through Christ, they will not get into heaven. Sy speaks up a lot about sexuality because it has a lot to do with his past. He said, “Both straight people and gay people can go to hell [if they have not been redeemed by Christ].” I think this reminds people to remove their self from pedestals; they are not better than another. He said further, “People struggle because they are human”. God knows this, He knows our struggles, and He wants us regardless of their existence. I think this is beautiful and reassuring (even though I knew it previously).
- People often define sin as bad behavior, distasteful behavior. Well, certainly that can be true. Sy went further and said sin is to “not do what God wants; to miss or fall short of the standard of God’s intent or design”. We could never meet all the marks, but Jesus reconciled that; He never failed. Sometimes we try to meet the standard, but fall short.
- It was also explained that there are MANY reasons why we sin. Yes, human nature has a big part of it, but that is not the only reason. These reasons explain our sin, but do not excuse them. Yet, as many times as we mess up, we can continue to return to God and ask Him to clean us and we will not be rejected.
- There is this perception that being a Christian solves all of life’s problems and makes it easier. This is not so. Christians still struggle, but instead of attempting those struggles on their own, they have Jesus. We still have temptation and sin in our lives. This realization means we can recognize when we are failing to “miss the mark” and turn to God. Additionally, since all humans struggle with different desires we are to love one another regardless of behavior. This is not to be accepting of behavior, but rather to love like Christ. God is the judge of the person, not us (“Do not show partiality in judging; hear both small and great alike. Do not be afraid of any man, for judgment belongs to God. Bring me any case too hard for you, and I will hear it.” Deuteronomy 1:17). As Sy said, “I don’t have to be perfect for God to love me”.
- I especially was hit by Sy’s statement: “Love is to value someone”. It is so simple and Jesus showed it in the scripture so many times. He spoke to people and LOVED them, when society did not. This is true today. And so, even though I may not always agree with what people do or I miss the mark myself, I can turn to God and submit that downfall and trust in Him to work in me.
Sy gave so much information that I cannot include it all! I will just say God used him to impart a lot of information and wisdom to me. I am hoping that this creates transformation in me and the others who heard Sy. Also, by sharing I bet it will it give you all many things to think about. I’ll leave with this verse:
“So we have been greatly encouraged in the midst of our troubles and suffering, dear brothers and sisters, because you have remained strong in your faith”. 1 Thessalonians 3:7.

Ohh, and Happy Fourth of July! Lots of love and remember to take at least a moment to think about the many sacrifices that have been made by individuals for the USA.

Fun, Rehoboth, and Lessons

I had been hoping to update my blog more often, but time just seems to slip away from me. At night when I return from our ministry sites or an activity, I usually want to journal and check my email—that’s it. Contrary to this, is my desire to blog. So, instead of blogging consistently, I guess I blog in huge chunks. Since last time…

This past week has been full of experiences, wisdom, and information. I don’t want to jump to the most recent, although it would be exciting to write about! Now that I think about it, so much has happened since I last wrote. Let me break it down (now).

Friday June 25th:
This day was busy, but laid-back as well, if that makes any sense. I got up that morning to do laundry which was actually a pretty frustrating experience. After doing laundry, I had some one on one time with my discipler over lunch. I told her a little bit about how my experience had been going and some about my personal life. After about an hour, another girl joined us and we discussed our previous weeks and did a bible study. We talked about what love really is and referenced Romans 12:9-18 to consider love. Love is sincere, full of zeal, rejoice, patience, and many other things. Later that night, the whole project went to the Mets vs. Twins baseball game. It was fun to all be together, to enjoy each other’s company, and to watch some baseball!

That weekend I did many fun things (since weekends are generally free time). On Saturday, I got to visit my dear cousin in the Upper West Side. Getting there took me about an hour from where I am living and I was late! Whoops. She was gracious about it. I enjoyed delicious whole wheat pancakes, peaches, and blueberries with her and some of her friends. After her friends left, we were able to spend a couple hours together before she needed to start studying for her test. It was some sweet time since I rarely see her. Afterwards, I hopped on the train again and headed back home to wait for a friend. My friend and I went to a coffeeshop to journal and talk about our first week and what God has been doing. Then, later that night we went to a woman’s apartment (who had previously been on the same project) to eat dinner. It was a fun time with some of the other girls; laughing, sitting on the roof and staring at the skyline, and enjoying home cooked food. I really enjoyed the time there and seeing the faith the woman had that God wanted her in New York. The next day (Sunday), we went to a church called Bethel Gospel Assembly in Harlem. The church service was so joyful, upbeat, and honest. One of the main messages was that God will use my past to reshape me and to bless others. I thought that was a good reminder. Afterwards, a group of us went to a soul food restaurant, Amy Ruth’s, and many of them had chicken and waffles. I enjoyed seeing them experience that for the first time. Sunday nights we have a track meeting where we reflect on the previous week and look forward to our next sites…

Speaking of ministry sites, our second site was called Rehoboth Church! It is located in a Caribbean neighborhood of Brooklyn. This was our second week in Brooklyn and it has latched onto my heart—I am fond of Brooklyn now. Our job at this church was to spend time with the children and do a devotional with them. We shared the stories of Jonah, David and Saul, Jesus, and one other. We wanted to share stories about obedience, responding in love and God’s greatest love act for us…Jesus. Each day proved to be a little easier than the first, but still not without a lot of difficulty. A lot of the children like to run around and there is not a bunch of space. Additionally, most of them are in elementary school (a few are older), yet some of their innocence is gone. They tended to resort to violence, so we had to attempt to break up a lot of fights. Sometimes it was tiring, sometimes it was joyful and full of laughter, and frustrating. However, these kids took a piece of me and it was unfortunate that we did not have more time with them. We got four full days, but that’s not much. The last day we were able to enjoy the park with them. Some of our fellow track members will get the blessing of spending a week with them. It was not just work—it was a great reminder of God’s love not just for people, but for children. I feel like the church blessed us more than we blessed them—they were so good to us. They supplied us with meals every day (sometimes two meals), were concerned about our safety, and gifted us with t-shirts when we left. They were so good to us, but now that I think it about it, this just parallels God’s love for us. God’s love is greater than we deserve; greater than we expect.

Besides ministry site time, we had some meetings this week. At our Monday night meeting (MNM), we heard about confession and resolution. More specifically, how keeping sin to yourself creates a barrier between you and God…a barrier which can and has been removed time and time again. Unconfessed sin or problems between individuals can create issues too. It is best to bring it to the forefront and allow God to renew you in Jesus’ blood. Tuesday morning, we had bible study and were reminded that everyone has different types of struggles. However, we can come alongside them and offer hope and try to fulfill their spiritual and social needs. More specifically, we spoke of the financial struggles some have and how much we have the power to help them. We have been blessed, so what can we do in response and thanks?

Thursday and Friday we had a speaker called Sy Rogers who spoke about a MULTITUDE of things. It was great, encouraging, and a lot to take in. I’m still reflecting. Next blog entry, I will talk about what I learned from that.

Please continue to pray for what we do here. We have two weeks of ministry site work left- I don’t want to lose gusto, love, or energy. We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us (Philippians 4:13). Pray for unity on my team, track, and project. We also have a homeless outreach on Monday with the whole project. May we reach out to people without judgment, but with love and understanding. Until next time…which will be soon! Lots of love.